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Lost in a world of Darkness' Journal [entries|friends|calendar]
Lost in a world of Darkness

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[31 Oct 2004|02:33pm]
Happy Samhain!
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[23 May 2004|02:26pm]
I've decided to make my journal "friends only" and just use it for posting my poetry privately too.
You can comment here and I might add you, but I do not think I will add a lot of people.
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[24 Jan 2004|10:54pm]
Well, I have decided that I refuse to be intimidated by people posting anonymously in my journal! This space is for me and it is my personal space for telling the world about things!
I will make anything really peosonal "friends only", but I will not hide my head in shame because some coward who won't even identify themsleves is saying that my poetry is bad! What I write comes from my heart and I have been published in two anthologies, so unless they care to post poems of their own I will not take their comments to heart!
I write things that move my soul, and I know that what I write is fairly good, because everyone who reads it likes it!

So since I am still sharing, I will include another poem here!

Ghost Talker

You turn my eyes towards your face without saying
The spirits that swirl around you
Come, they say,
Come and see this creature not quite man!
Watch as his eyes weave a spell that slices into your torn and bloody heart!
And I am captured by the perfect magick that
And I watch in horror as my heart takes wings and
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?????? [20 Jan 2004|02:47am]
What am I still doing up??????
I am out of chamomile tea too! :(
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Well! [18 Jan 2004|07:30pm]
I guess I will have to disable anonymous posting now! Thanks to whoever you were for making me go look that up!
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SIGH! [18 Jan 2004|07:08pm]
One day I will have enough money to pay my rent, my electricity, and my phone bill all at once!
I need to get a new job, this is rediculous.
So, I am back now, at least for a month or so. I've been reading a lot while I've been offline, so I guess that's a good thing. I actually finally read The Spiral Dance! It was an amazing book! I have been meaning to read that for along time!
Nothing else, really, my life is boring! :)
I need to go read all my friends list now. I have a lot of catching up to do!
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I am soooooo sick! [30 Dec 2003|12:50am]
I got the flu that's going around! I feel like I'm going to die!
Everyone send good energy my way, I need it!
I am going to drink some more echinacea tea and lay down. I will post more poems when I feel better.
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Happy Holidays! [25 Dec 2003|06:09pm]
Merry Yule everyone!
or Saturnalia!
I wish I had someone to celebrate the Saturnalia with! LOL!

I did the X-Mas at the parent's house yesterday and drove home this morning. I got some nice clothes that are totally not my style which I will probably exchange. A nice bath & body set that I plan to use in a few minutes. A pretty Mexican teapot that's hand painted with little people. And a pair of slippers!
That was a pretty good haul.

Now I am off to have a nice relaxing bath with good scents and candles and then a nap in my warm bed.

Hope everyone has a good holiday and gets lots of nice pressies!
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TGIF [19 Dec 2003|10:55pm]
I had coffee with a friend this evening and we talked about how Modern Paganism is becoming a major spiritual movement in the U.S. It was a great conversation. I think he's a great guy, but I'm not quite sure how he feels about me. I'll tell you something though, he is so easy to talk to! And he has the yummiest green eyes! *smirk*

Here is another poem. I hope somebody's enjoying these!

I whisper to the night
Hold me
Love me
Rock me to sleep
I whisper softly to the night
It is you I love
You, my intimate
My lover
My solace
Envelop me in your dusky arms
And take me somewhere away
Away, I whisper
From here and those who hate me
Away where the sky is clear and scattered with stars
You, oh night are my one true love
My knight in tarnished armor riding
To sweep me away
And hold me close to your moonlit face
As I whisper
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I'm back! [18 Dec 2003|08:46pm]
Well that was fun!
I hate being so broke sometimes. My phone got turned off for being overdue $20. I was short last montha nd thought that they wouldn't shut it off if I paid at least a little bit on it. No, they did it anyway. So since I use dial up i was S-O-L for two weeks or so!
Well I'm back now.
After getting some encoragement from Sister Sinister, I have decided to go ahead an post some of my poems in my journal!
Here are a few:

The Price of Darkness
You move me in the quiet of the night
You enter my soul like the soft wet of the wind
Your evil draws me into your world and spins me around on a dizzying journey
I feel the dark in my soul answer your call
Cry out in return as our bodies join
You take me under the moon in heat and lust
And I give up my heart's wine to you
But what price will this darkness demand
When the soft light of morning illuminates our sweat shimmered skin?
When I turn to you I find you sadly mortal
The leftover wine the only stain on your lips
And I realize that this is not love
Just lust and heat and leftover remose
I did not love you, only used you
To open the darkness inside of me

You look at me with open spite
Your morals of what's wrong and right
Cloud the sense you may have had
I hear you whisper "She's so sad"
"She only dresses in that style
Because she thinks she's mean and vile
That pentagram she wears so near
Is evil that we do not fear"
Well let me tell you something, dear
If you'll open up your ears
The goddess that I serve is love
And laughter, moonlight from above
She holds more joy than you can feel
In your silly world of steel
My clothes reflect my own true soul
Reflecting from a greater whole
This teardrop painted on my face
Is saddness for the human race
For ones like you who cannot see
The joy of being truly free
So yes I'm different and have no shame
Expect for those who look all the same
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Hello, me again! [05 Dec 2003|11:13pm]
Well, I actually made a few private entries in this thing.
I was mostly posting my poetry, because I'm not sure it's good enough for people to read yet. I am also checking out different poetry and writing communities so I can learn even more.
I found a few really good ones out there, and even a poetry rating community, but I'm a little bit scared of that one, some of the members look pretty mean and I'm not very good with nasty criticism! LOL!
I was also reading an entry on someone's journal today that was posted in the animal rights community and was surprised at how outright mean some of these people were to this girl who had an idea about supporting animal rights! Like it was totally uncalled for mean! I added her as a friend, even though I'm not crazy about her idea.
I guess that now I know what "LJ Drama" is!
Maybe I'll get brave enough to post more poems soon. And join that mean community!
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Today [02 Dec 2003|11:40pm]
Today has been a boring, uneventful day.
I took an online quiz. Isn't that exciting?
Don't worry, I don't plan on filling up my journal with these things!

</td><td valign="top">You are a geek. Good for you! Considering the endless complexity of the universe, as well as whatever discipline you happen to be most interested in, you'll never be bored as long as you have a good book store, a net connection, and thousands of dollars worth of expensive equipment. Assuming you're a technical geek, you'll be able to afford it, too. If you're not a technical geek, you're geek enough to mate with a technical geek and thereby get the needed dough. Dating tip: Don't date a geek of the same persuasion as you. You'll constantly try to out-geek the other.</td></tr>
You are 52% geek

Take the Polygeek Quiz at Thudfactor.com

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I'm Back! [01 Dec 2003|11:55pm]
Well, that was fairly interesting. It wasn't as traumatic as I thought it might be. The family on my mom's side ended up only being my grandmother and my mom. My uncle Joe and my aunts Veronica and Shelly came with my grandfather on my dad's side. Joe and Shelly ended up getting drunk and yelling at each other and my grandfather wouldn't shut up about my tattoo but that was about all the drama that happened.
The dinner was excellent but I feel like I need to fast for a week now. There were four kinds of pies! And, of course there ended up being three grean bean casseroles like on that commercial!
I think I need to take some time to relax and decompress now. I need to also come up with a good Yule ritual. I don't have a lot of friends on my LJ list yet, but do any of you have any ideas for a ritual that would work to inspire peace and fertility in the New Year? I would like to give it a Norse feel, as I think that Nordic tradition goes well with this time of the year.
I decided that I will try to write in my LiveJournal every day. I may make some of my entries private if they involve a lot of inner feelings and magickal workings. Unless my friends are really interested in seeing them! :)
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Thanksgiving. [26 Nov 2003|04:42pm]
Well, I am off to my Mother's house in Austin for Thanksgiving Day with the family.
I really hate going there. They are a bunch of really closeminded christians who always want to ask me about my beliefs. But they don't even listen when I tell them, they just start talking about the bible.
It is funny that my Mother who beat me when I was a child is now some big HOLIER THAN THOU christian. She never even asked me to forgive her when she got saved.
I guess it is my responsibility to go though, since my Grandmother may not be around much longer.
I don't like having to celebrate Thanksgiving though. I think it is not the kind of holiday we should teach our children about due to what the white men did to the Native Americans.
I had a vision once of the horror of the white man's oppression once when I was doing a past life regression. I was Native American in a former life, but I never found out which tribe. I do know that my totem animal is the Raven. That's where I get my name!

I will be back on Monday!
Send good energy my way so I don't end up killing any relatives!
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[25 Nov 2003|06:34pm]
Well I updated my colors to purple and blood red!
I think my journal looks a lot nicer now!

Tonight I think I want to take a nice long hot bath with candles and incense and just pamper myself. I've been having a hard time at work lately and I really need to take some time just for myself and relax. I might do a little candle ritual later on. I need to generate more positive energy in my work place.

I'll post how that turns out!

Now, a little poem from me to my journal.

Once Upon a Time
Once when we were faeries
We flew brightly, shining light
Carefree and happy
Through forest glen and moonless night
Once when there were dragons
We'd fly to light upon the tail
And talk for hours with ancient wyrm
Of treasures deep and elves so pale
The faerie kin have flown away
And ugly concrete fills the sky
The earthen spirits weep and wail
For times that seem to pass us by
But maybe someday we'll rejoice
And sing our faerie song of mirth
When mankind passes like the tide
And magick once more fills the earth
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MERRY MEET! [25 Nov 2003|03:25pm]
I now have a new computer at home and I decided to join, thanks to my friend who gave me a code. Now i can DO LiveJournal instead of living vicariously through her!

SO! Hello, all!
I just got set up and have joined some communities that looked interesting and added some people as friends.
If I added you, it is probably because you looked cool or interesting or I just thought you were cute! *WEG*
It would be great if you would add me back! And also let me know of any other people you think I would like.

I have a friend helping me work on my layout so that will hopefully be all pretty and dark and bloody really soon! I really do NOT like that default layout!

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